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date: Thu, 20 Mar 2003 15:57:53 -0600
from: worm 1
subject: breakfast of champions personality quiz

  please take out a piece of paper and a pencil. now fold the paper in half. now fold it in half again. now fold it in half crosswise, so as to form a triangle. congratulations, you have now passed the first of many trials. please take out another piece of paper to complete the "what kind of breakfast of champions am i?" personality quiz. do not scroll ahead!

you have just failed the second part of the test. now with your piece of paper, please answer the following questions as they best suit your personality.

1. do you have eleven fingers?
a) no
b) yes
c) maybe
d) i don't know

2. have you been to japan in the last 6 months?
a) no
b) yes
c) maybe
d) i don't know

3. is it true that "every time a bell rings, an angel get its wings"?
a) no
b) yes
c) maybe
d) i don't know

4. how many fingers am i holding up?
a) 1
b) 11
c) maybe
d) 3

5. have you even bothered to read this far?
a) no
b) yes
c) maybe
d) i don't know

add up your points:
1. (a) 4 points (b) 7 points (c) 10 points (d) 9 points
2. (a) 6 points (b) 3 points (c) 10 points (d) 9 points
3. (a) 5 points (b) 4 points (c) 10 points (d) 9 points
4. (a) 4 points (b) 9 points (c) 10 points (d) 7 points
5. (a) 5 points (b) 6 points (c) 10 points (d) 9 points


50: you excel at mediocrity
45-49: you are a veritable genius
35-48: you sometimes wish for more
23-34: you have seen the television show "friends" at least twice
14-22: you have forwarded bill gates microsoft money making email at least three times. and will again if it one day returns to you.
0-13: i have no idea how you got this score

thanks for taking the breakfast of champions personality test. if you've read this far you'll be glad to know there is no breakfast of champions this weekend, for i shall be out of town. but don't let my absence stop you. go out! be happy! eat egg's benedict with hopeless abandon! enjoy yourselves, the breakfast of champions will be returning to a theater near you soon.

Ding-Dong! Breakfast Of Champions Calling!